Burst of bubble

This episode of my blog is not all about me though I may inject some things about me. This is all about my cousin-in-law's business. Which is Balloons. She makes good balloon designs. These are some the things she did. I tried to do things like these, I can but it does not look good. Sometimes, I may think of being like a balloon, will burst whenever it can't carry the pressure inside.

Daydreaming. No more!

In some ways, I am like Carrie. We both have curly hair (sort of!). Both don't have mother (I lost my mom when I was seventeen). Both have a bitchy-bitch sister and a loving father.Just like her I have a lot of dreams, from small to big, from simple to complex. Right now, I'm starting to realize all my dreams, many of my dreams. I can't say enough about me and Carrie's resemblances 'cause I've watched only a part. Perhaps, I could tell you what my dreams are. I feel sick whenever I think of my dreams not coming true so I try so hard to realize how would I achieve my dreams. Dreams. Dreams. Dreams.

1. This year, be a teacher. (It's coming true now and in few months time, I will be.)

2. My target five years from now is to have my masteral and after that is doctorate.

3. I want to put up businesses. (Take note! Plural.)

4. Photographer

5. Writer/Blogger

6. Travel the world

7. Thespian (My very big dream)

8. And top of it all, I WANT TO BE MYSELF!

You are probably wondering how would I take these things to reality or I am just mistaken? Maybe it's me who is wondering. That is what I am trying to figure out. First thing, perhaps, is to avoid relationships at the moment. As much as possible, emotion should never overshadow reason because I know 'you are trouble when you walk in'. So for now, sacrifice. I may seem so ambitious but for me, it's natural.

 

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Tired and Weary

It has been a very busy month for me. I can’t even find time to unwind. The more we get closer to the end (actually, the beginning), the more I feel like stopping and drifting away but there’s no turning back now. Everything just seems to move faster that it leaves me behind.

Every day (weekdays, for that matter), I have to wake up early so that I could prepare our breakfast and later on while eating; I will be mastering my lesson for that day. And before 7am, I should have arrived in school so I could still prepare myself and check my pupils (there’s no way I can deviate to the usual routines). At 7:15, my busy day starts. It’s my time to teach, shout, stand, and curse (of course it’s only in my mind). Then at 11:10 (my vacant), I will start to review and update my to-do list. And at 12 – 1 is my me-time. Time to eat and to freshen up. If there is one good thing that I learned from this experience is to move faster than usual. Eat fast or be late. I can’t even eat my lunch properly because I have to hurry, even at breakfast that’s why I end up with an empty stomach. Everything in my life now is always in haste.  Hurry up when you’re cooking! Hurry up when you’re eating. Hurry up when you’re taking a bath, brushing your teeth, combing your hair, fixing your things.

Again, at 1-4 is a life spent in hell (I’m just kidding)! I don’t even know how hell looks like. Actually, I really love my second period in the afternoon because my pupils are cute and adorable. At 4pm, while working with school papers, I’ll be waiting for my co-PST’s who are, unfortunately, designated outside our school. And when they arrive, we’ll go home. At home, I’ll do my share of the household chores then after eating our dinner, I will be spending the rest of my time in my study table working with multifarious tasks like lesson plan, instructional materials, PT Book and the like until I feel like sleeping. That’s how my day goes and ends. Wake up early and sleep late. I don’t know if I can keep up to this cause I feel like losing my liberty to be me and to do what I want to do. If I’m tiresome and wearisome, I feel my eyes well with tears and the next thing I knew, tears are already streaming down my face. If I could just only curse, hit and walk out, I already did but I can’t or should I say I must not! 

Cold Nostalgia

Dream. Believe. Survive!

Belief, hard work, love -- you have those things, you can do anything.

-By Pauline "Posey" Benetto in "For One More Day" by Mitch Albom

It was a line from a dialogue between Chick, Catherine -- Chick's wife and Posey -- Chick's mom. It was one of the times his mother stood up for him. They were arguing if Chick should put up a sports bar or not. Those are the three things that Posey believe can help Chick do and achieve his dreams but apparently not.

Anyways, officially, our first sem of being fourth year is over and another stepping stone is for us to take. But just like Chick, I believe these things are not enough if I want to make it til the end (not actually the end). Yes, you have to believe. Believe that you can, that you can go further, that you can outwit others or that you can be who you want to be. Life is what you make it, they say. 'Pag naniwala ka, mangyayari but if not now, maybe tomorrow, the next day, next month or next year. Just be patient.

But if belief and patience did not work, try those with hard work. Baka naman kasi naniwala o naghintay ka nalang, gumawa ka din. Hindi naman lagi pag naniwala ka, mangyayari. Just like the story of Juan Tamad. Juan Tamad (Tamad means lazy or sluggish) is a boy who slept under a guava tree waiting for a fruit to fall in his mouth. He believed that the fruit will fall so he slept and waited. But when he woke up, the fruit was gone. So you see, being patient and believing alone won't work, it should be coupled with hard work.

But if belief and patience coupled with hard work still fail you, add love, will and optimism.

Love what you do or simply, do what you love. Sabi nga ni Sir Armanel Libunao, "Make your passion your profession".

When you do something because you are loving and enjoying it and not just for compliance sake, you'll be successful. Sabi pa ni Sir Nel, "Kung hindi ka na masaya sa trabaho (o sa ginagawa) mo at hinihintay mo nalang ang sweldo  mo, mag-resign ka na kung hindi, pareho kayong masisira. Masisira ang trabaho mo at ikaw sa mata ng mga tao".

And if finally, you got what you aimed, always show acts of humility. With those things, success will not be so difficult to chase. If i'm to give an unsolicited advice to myself and those who believe me, that would be

"Don't stop thinking about tomorrow", "Stop, relax and have fun when you're tired and weary" and finally sabi ulit ni Sir Nel, "In everything you do, always do your best".  

CRAM Brulee

I am done with my demo teaching! Yahey! So happy (and pretty and witty and bright -- got hooked by the movie 'Anger Management'). It was a mixed of emotions. I felt happy, elated, disappointed, sad and proud. Yes, I am proud of myself. It's an achievement. I am asked to stand in front of the grade 6 pupils and I did. I made it.

Hours before the supposed demo, I was cramming and I hate it. But despite of the cramming, I did not feel nervous and I don't know why (I think I am no longer normal! That's cool!). Just confused. What's really abnormal about me is that I’m thinking I’m nervous, when in fact, I’m not (that's not cool! I'm being neurotic, ain't I?).

During the demo, I’m still cool but a bit tired so I prayed (thank you Lord for staying beside me). It was so fast! One moment, I was cramming and then later, I'm done. I am also glad that I did not receive very negative, downright comments from pushy D! But I do felt dissatisfied with my performance. I know I can do better than that. Anyways, there's always a next time.

After the demo, I had to attend my Monday class which is Inorganic Chem. I'm so exhausted to function that is why I could not absorb the lesson so when we had a quiz, all I could answer was 'what is asked and what are the given'.

Tirintas

 What? HAHA. I can't do anything. I just keep on braiding and twisting and braiding my hair repeatedly. I am such a nuts! I should have accomplished something by now. Okay! Enough of the bumming...

(After a few moments...) I, still, can't do something relevant. I just keep on doing the same thing. Perhaps, I am thinking that I am one of the Filipino majors. They are tasked to popularise something and that is braiding. It is their culminating activity for their course subject, Kulturang Popular (or Popular Culture).

Long hair, short hair. Highschool student, college student. Waterfall braid, fishtail braid, french twist. I hope, they can fulfill their task.

Look! I braided myself. (4-strand braid)